{"id":7178,"date":"2017-11-21T18:47:26","date_gmt":"2017-11-21T18:47:26","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/amazingproperty.com.ng\/blog\/dealing-with-difficult-people-in-your-homeowners-association\/"},"modified":"2017-11-21T18:47:26","modified_gmt":"2017-11-21T18:47:26","slug":"dealing-with-difficult-people-in-your-homeowners-association","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/amazingproperty.com.ng\/blog\/dealing-with-difficult-people-in-your-homeowners-association\/","title":{"rendered":"Dealing With Difficult People In Your Homeowner&#039;s Association"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>\n<\/p>\n<div readability=\"80.46336710834\">\n<p>Living in a homeowner association, there is likelihood of running into someone that is, how should we say it, less than happy. We all have to deal with difficult people at some point. Some focus on what they don&#8217;t like about a person (loudmouth, condescending tone, etc) and then hope they will change. Not surprisingly, this rarely creates the change we desire.\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>\n<p>For many, personal experience with conflict creates a recurring cycle. This cycle can be positive or negative depending on the beliefs about conflict that we developed at an early age. What someone says or does can spark an automatic response based on those beliefs. This, in turn, triggers a consequence that usually reinforces our behavior pattern.<\/p>\n<p>The key to dealing with a difficult person is to change your relationship with that person by:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Taking the responsibility to examine your own thoughts and feelings about the difficult person.<\/li>\n<p>&#13;<\/p>\n<li>Understanding what kind of relationship you would like to have with the difficult person.<\/li>\n<p>&#13;<\/p>\n<li>Taking notice of the behavior rather than making assumptions about what that behavior means, and<\/li>\n<p>&#13;<\/p>\n<li>Examining your approach to communicating with that person.<\/li>\n<p>&#13;\n<\/ul>\n<p>The next time you are confronted by a difficult person, what do you see them doing that causes you to react negatively? Consider the following:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Facial expressions<\/li>\n<p>&#13;<\/p>\n<li>Eye contact or lack of eye contact<\/li>\n<p>&#13;<\/p>\n<li>Gestures<\/li>\n<p>&#13;<\/p>\n<li>Tone of their voice<\/li>\n<p>&#13;<\/p>\n<li>Screaming or whining<\/li>\n<p>&#13;<\/p>\n<li>Words and\/or the meaning of the words<\/li>\n<p>&#13;\n<\/ul>\n<p>Pay close attention to their behavior patterns. What is working and what is not? Have you made assumptions about what these actions mean?<\/p>\n<p>Next, pay attention to your behavior. What is working and what is not? What do others do that works better? If you don&#8217;t set aside your assumptions, you may never realize what are you are responding to.<\/p>\n<p>Now, take the time to consider how your actions may affect the other person. Consider the message you may be sending them. Finally, decide what you would like the relationship to be and make a plan that will move you toward that goal. What do you want them to understand? How will you present yourself? What will you say?<\/p>\n<p>Treat every interaction with a difficult person as an opportunity to improve your relationship. Allow yourself to see the larger patterns of behavior, both theirs and yours. Imagine yourself to be a third party observing your interactions with the difficult person. If your approach to conflict isn&#8217;t working, exchange it for one that will move you toward a better relationship.<\/p>\n<p><i>For more innovative homeowner association management strategies, see www.Regenesis.net<\/i>.<\/p>\n<\/p><\/div>\n<p><a hre=\"http:\/\/realtytimes.com\/archives\/item\/1007171-20171122-dealing-with-difficult-people-in-your-homeowners-association\"> Realtytimes <\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Living in a homeowner association, there is likelihood of running into someone that is, how should &hellip; <a title=\"Dealing With Difficult People In Your Homeowner&#039;s Association\" class=\"hm-read-more\" href=\"https:\/\/amazingproperty.com.ng\/blog\/dealing-with-difficult-people-in-your-homeowners-association\/\"><span class=\"screen-reader-text\">Dealing With Difficult People In Your Homeowner&#039;s Association<\/span>Read more<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":7179,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"advanced_seo_description":"","jetpack_seo_html_title":"","jetpack_seo_noindex":false,"jetpack_seo_schema_type":"","_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[4],"tags":[12908,543,627,1007,818,219],"class_list":["post-7178","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-opportunities-in-new-markets","tag-home","tag-home-buying-guide","tag-homeowners","tag-owners","tag-real","tag-realty"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/amazingproperty.com.ng\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/11\/3542b2110ec81d4e75334e5d239317ea_S.jpg?fit=424%2C277&ssl=1","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":7275,"url":"https:\/\/amazingproperty.com.ng\/blog\/ask-the-hoa-expert-governing-document-provisions\/","url_meta":{"origin":7178,"position":0},"title":"Ask the HOA Expert: Governing Document Provisions","author":"Amazing Property","date":"November 28, 2017","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Our governing documents have a provision that limits rental agreements to 12 months except for extenuating situations approved by the board. Since the HOA has not been turned over yet by the developer, is the developer the \"board\" and does this give him the power to change the rules\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Opportunities In New Markets&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Opportunities In New Markets","link":"https:\/\/amazingproperty.com.ng\/blog\/category\/opportunities-in-new-markets\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"E7f9c5dd1d098a0ec550efccea7e79f4 S.jpg","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/amazingproperty.com.ng\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/11\/e7f9c5dd1d098a0ec550efccea7e79f4_S.jpg?fit=424%2C284&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":7176,"url":"https:\/\/amazingproperty.com.ng\/blog\/condo-gate-is-there-a-scandal-in-your-community-association\/","url_meta":{"origin":7178,"position":1},"title":"Condo Gate : Is there a Scandal in your Community Association?","author":"Amazing Property","date":"August 21, 2022","format":false,"excerpt":"Once in a while, we do learn of such scandals, which I would call \"condo gate. Question. I own a unit in a condominium association. It is managed by a property management company. The wife of the President of the Board of Directors has been employed by that management company.\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Opportunities In New Markets&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Opportunities In New Markets","link":"https:\/\/amazingproperty.com.ng\/blog\/category\/opportunities-in-new-markets\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"condo gate","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/amazingproperty.com.ng\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/11\/condo-gate.jpg?fit=424%2C284&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":4663,"url":"https:\/\/amazingproperty.com.ng\/blog\/ask-the-hoa-expert-conflicts-of-interest-on-the-board\/","url_meta":{"origin":7178,"position":2},"title":"Ask the HOA Expert: Conflicts Of Interest On The Board","author":"Amazing Property","date":"May 23, 2017","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Concerning the possible conflict of interest that develops with managers who are hired by HOA developers: In our HOA, the manager is the developer. We now have a number of construction related problems that the developer refuses to fix. The developer\/manager attends all board meetings to audit board discussions\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Opportunities In New Markets&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Opportunities In New Markets","link":"https:\/\/amazingproperty.com.ng\/blog\/category\/opportunities-in-new-markets\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/amazingproperty.com.ng\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/05\/e2ba55c4ebc91916b806a0ec94e1dc2f_M.jpg?fit=300%2C200&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":8810,"url":"https:\/\/amazingproperty.com.ng\/blog\/government-seeks-to-make-urban-water-sanitation-utilities-viable-entities\/","url_meta":{"origin":7178,"position":3},"title":"Government seeks to make urban water,  sanitation utilities viable entities","author":"Amazing Property","date":"July 9, 2018","format":false,"excerpt":"Minister of Water Resources, Mr. Suleiman AdamuTowards addressing Nigeria\u2019s mounting development problems, including enhanced quality of life, the Federal Government has called for the transformation of urban water, sanitation and hygiene (WASH) utilities into financial viable entities. It noted that the pathway to be taken to accomplish utility transformation is\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Opportunities In New Markets&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Opportunities In New Markets","link":"https:\/\/amazingproperty.com.ng\/blog\/category\/opportunities-in-new-markets\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"Adamu 1062x598.jpg","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/amazingproperty.com.ng\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/07\/Adamu-1062x598.jpg?fit=1062%2C598&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/amazingproperty.com.ng\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/07\/Adamu-1062x598.jpg?fit=1062%2C598&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/amazingproperty.com.ng\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/07\/Adamu-1062x598.jpg?fit=1062%2C598&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/amazingproperty.com.ng\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/07\/Adamu-1062x598.jpg?fit=1062%2C598&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/amazingproperty.com.ng\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/07\/Adamu-1062x598.jpg?fit=1062%2C598&ssl=1&resize=1050%2C600 3x"},"classes":[]},{"id":6490,"url":"https:\/\/amazingproperty.com.ng\/blog\/times-are-changing-smoking-in-your-condo\/","url_meta":{"origin":7178,"position":4},"title":"Times Are Changing: Smoking In Your Condo","author":"Amazing Property","date":"October 3, 2017","format":false,"excerpt":"Smokers, beware! \"The times, they are a-changing.\" And with more and more marijuana use, this is now a hot-button topic.\r \r If your next door neighbor in your condominium association cooks his native food which creates an objectionable odor, will your condo board of directors be required to take any\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Opportunities In New Markets&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Opportunities In New Markets","link":"https:\/\/amazingproperty.com.ng\/blog\/category\/opportunities-in-new-markets\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"Bc696f3d7c06e713e5dfc9cba2a9a517 S.jpg","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/amazingproperty.com.ng\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/10\/bc696f3d7c06e713e5dfc9cba2a9a517_S.jpg?fit=424%2C284&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":4650,"url":"https:\/\/amazingproperty.com.ng\/blog\/new-homes-continue-downsizing-trend\/","url_meta":{"origin":7178,"position":5},"title":"New Homes Continue Downsizing Trend","author":"Amazing Property","date":"May 22, 2017","format":false,"excerpt":"[ad_1] In the first quarter of 2017, new single-family homes continued the trend of decreasing in size, the National Association of Home Builders reports on its Eye on Housing blog. Read more: Hot New-Home Trends to Watch Builders have largely focused on the higher end of the market following the\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Opportunities In New Markets&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Opportunities In New Markets","link":"https:\/\/amazingproperty.com.ng\/blog\/category\/opportunities-in-new-markets\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/amazingproperty.com.ng\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/05\/NAHB%20survey.png?fit=717%2C546&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/amazingproperty.com.ng\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/05\/NAHB%20survey.png?fit=717%2C546&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/amazingproperty.com.ng\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/05\/NAHB%20survey.png?fit=717%2C546&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/amazingproperty.com.ng\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/05\/NAHB%20survey.png?fit=717%2C546&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x"},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/amazingproperty.com.ng\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7178","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/amazingproperty.com.ng\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/amazingproperty.com.ng\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/amazingproperty.com.ng\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/amazingproperty.com.ng\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=7178"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/amazingproperty.com.ng\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7178\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/amazingproperty.com.ng\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/7179"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/amazingproperty.com.ng\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=7178"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/amazingproperty.com.ng\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=7178"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/amazingproperty.com.ng\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=7178"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}